Thank you to Sean for adding a “Contact” block here to my website and under “About,” so if anyone wants to ask me onto a podcast, to lead a retreat, or give a workshop, you can easily get in touch.
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When I was growing up, good women were seen-not-heard, so lately life’s been an adjustment. To be asked onto podcasts as Practice of the Presence was birthed, not only to be asked about Brother Lawrence but also about my own journey, has been both YAY! and WTF. In for a dollar, in for a gold brick. . . .
You’re invited to listen in. Josh Patterson and Greg Farrand–Josh and Greg–on (Re)Thinking Faith got me to talking about everything. Listen here to the (Re)Thinking Faith conversation we enjoyed. It’s magical what active listening will do. Thank you both! But imagine being asked what you think about taboo topics growing up when a part of you, despite all your True Self work and Shadow work, is still a wounded 5-year-old. Much loved, but still 5 and still recovering.
To talk freely as I did with Josh and Greg tells you A LOT about Josh and Greg. And their wise kindness. Because I suffer from, live with, and try to practice-the-presence my way through (also breathwork-my-way, see-a-therapist, chant, listen-&-be-kind-to-others, and go-for-walks) through severe anxiety.
This severe anxiety is like an inner blindness so real it’s hard to describe to others. I don’t remember saying this and only know because Josh and Greg later posted this cool computer-coding meme with a quote by me: “Christianity has a lot of beautiful treasures that have been buried under binaries….and binaries rarely work.” It’s here on IG @practiceofthepresencebook.
Kind listening draws out of you what you didn’t know lay in you. That is such a powerful experience to have about the ocean of interdependence we all swim in, live, move, and have our being in, and that includes with all creatures, even and especially the roly-poly walking on the sidewalk that I try not to step on.
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Kind listening also happened on Encountering Silence with Cassidy Hall, Kevin Johnson, and Carl McColman. Afterwards, when they posted two beautiful memes with my quotes on them, I learned I said: “I’ve always had a special relationship with trees. They feel like the keepers of silence.” And “I was able somehow with the silence to hear the self compassion.” Those are here and here. In my experience lately, I’ve decided when others actively listen to you and you dare risk being open yourself, prayerfully and mindfully, it’s not unlike walking out into the listening forest, silence embracing you with its ancient loving openness and anything truly can happen then. Listen here to the Encountering Silence conversation.
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It’s easier to say to students: “Get out of your comfort zone. You only live once. Be open to discovery in my class. Invest in yourself. Honor your voice.” Than it is to do it yourself. This summer I helped do interviewing for the Mystics Summit for The Shift Network. With dyslexia and anxiety, I made notes upon notes and did a mountain of research to ensure I pronounced names and words right and could listen well.
I also reached out to a stranger-now-a-good-friend, Emily, who said yes to helping me get the word out about the friar and his wise teachings in Practice of the Presence. For three months Emily (also a busy, successful playwright) taught me SO much about getting out of my comfort zone, answering my questions with the following: “Yeh–you can’t do that on your desktop–IG’s a mobile app–gotta do it on your phone.” And “Yeh–you can do whatever you want with that.” And “Just be authentic.” (The last two were advice for how to handle an IG Live Launch for the book.)
Because of Emily, I had the courage to learn how to use Canva and Headliner on my own. Truth is, having things go wrong is part of the process, and just pressing this and that and trying again gently, as another friend recommends, is really helpful.
With Canva and this newfound courage, I began this month to make and post on social media my own mixes of my translation with art, including choosing colors, backgrounds, fonts, and more. I have a plan. I started at the beginning of Practice of the Presence, picking quotes that stand out to me as helpful or beautiful, and it’s been very creatively fulfilling. In fact, it’s a lot like lectio divina. Focusing on individual words and also how they work together. Meditating on them as I create them. It’s satisfying to my soul.
With such friendships, old and new, old (middle-aged) and young, I also found the courage to start adding videos to my YouTube Channel (at 100 followers I can customize the URL for it). Until then here is my YouTube Channel’s bitly link (it’s bit.ly/CarmensYouTube).
I am thankful over and again because all summer I have experienced how active listening is what we most need, and I rededicate myself daily to trying to be an active listener.
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So many people have written or messaged me to say how much my translation of Brother Lawrence means to them, and for that, I can say, My prayers were that the humble friar’s wisdom might be kindness and calmness in the world as well as gently disruptive, helping us all become more embodied compassion.
One kind friend posted a quote on Facebook that perhaps I said in the (Re)Thinking Faith podcast (I’m not sure where he found it or heard it): “I just want to be as good of a human as my cat, Tao, is a cat.” And this is true. He said, “That was such a gift to me this morning.” And my heart is full with such kind community.
I’m also exhausted from the launch activities. But being kind to myself and recovering. You never knew or rather I never knew that publishing a book these days has as much to do about getting-the-word-out in our Horton-hears-a-Who-world as it does about countless hours invested in researching, writing, and revising it. To the amazing friends, launch team members, who helped me do this, thank you again.
For an introvert with an extrovert interface, that kind of getting-the-word-out does not come naturally. Even with such a good thing as the friar and his work. You know, introverts prefer communing with ancient spiritual classics and this morning’s snowy white egrets in the marsh.
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Yes, this blog is a mix. Life is also a mix. Grateful for the mix and the intermixing of it all.
I’m so grateful for my family and my friends and for the kindness in the world.